Winnipeg Woman Breaks Longstanding Vow Never to Leave the City with Visit to Pool in Steinbach


Winnipeg woman Anne Pankratz has been perfectly content with her suburban Winnipeg lifestyle, never needing to leave the city for any reason whatsoever. That is until she found out about the existence of a public swimming pool complete with waterslide way out in Steinbach.

“I’ve never left the city in 40 years,” said Pankratz. “But the lure of chlorine was too much for me and my family to resist.”

So this past Wednesday, Pankrtaz packed up the kids, popped Frozen 2 into the headrest DVD player, and ventured out to the wilds of Steinbach.

“It was quite the journey. We had to stop at the A&W by Deacon’s Corner for gas and Cheetos,” said Pankratz. “But after 30 long minutes we finally arrived at the pool. It was paradise.”

Upon arriving at the Steinbach Aquatic Centre, Pankratz soon discovered the place was packed with city folks.

“I don’t know what’s going on here,” said Pankratz. “It’s strange. I didn’t hear a single Plautdietsch accent anywhere. It’s like everyone was coming from Winnipeg or something.”

Meanwhile, all the young moms in Steinbach are still venturing into the city anytime they want to have a nice glass of wine without scrutiny.

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