WINNIPEG, MB The Winnipeg Jets scored a major coup this week after signing hometown hero and NHL legend Jonathan Toews, who, according to rumours, signed with the team exclusively because “they’re the only ones who […]
Of all the mysteries that have befallen the Mennonite community over the centuries, the most baffling is why Loewen is pronounced “Low-en” and Toews is pronounced “Taves.” For consistency they should either be pronounced Layven […]
ROSTHERN, SK After a cold snap in Rosthern, Saskatchewan, Mrs. Anita Friesen has resorted to double and even triple-socking her feet to prevent her Toews from Friesen. “My Toews Froese Fast,” said Friesen. “They were […]
HOLLYWOOD, CA The most shocking moment in Sunday’s Oscar broadcast was not a slap or an errant envelope, but the fact that the Oscar folks pronounced ‘Toews’ correctly. “Oh, great, here it comes. He’s going […]
DENVER, CO After the Stanley Cup successes of Jonathan Toews and Devon Toews (no relation), NHL squads are now looking to sign any and every Toews they can get their hands on. “Get a Toews […]
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