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steinbach

Unger Conviction

Thousands of Geese Congregate at the Pond by the MHV for Steinbach’s Largest Church Service

October 4, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB With the pandemic restricting the size of human church services in the Steinbach area, it seems the local Canada goose population has decided to flaunt their ability to congregate uninhibited. “Not even the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Driver Given Five Demerits for ‘Driving Like a Steinbacher’

September 26, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Mr. Reimer was pulled over this week for ‘driving like he doesn’t know what the heck he’s doing’ aka ‘driving like a Steinbacher’. Reimer is a test subject for a new public safety […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mannanites Axcited for New Fast & Furious Movie: Main Street Steinbach Edition!

August 8, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Young Mannanite dads love to shirk their responsibilities at home and drive their Honda Civics and Mazda 3s down Main Street Steinbach all the time yet once. Their ability to maneuver used Japanese […]

The Daily Bonnet

Niverville Vows to Overtake Steinbach for Most Number of Traffic Lights

March 21, 2020 Andrew

NIVERVILLE, MB With its first traffic light forthcoming this summer, the town of Niverville is eager to surpass rival community Steinbach for the title of most traffic lights in the Southeast. “Sure, we’ve only got […]

The Daily Bonnet

Passport Now Required to Visit Jantsied

January 28, 2020 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Authorities at the border crossing in Rosenort have just announced that starting next month Mennonites will be required to show a valid passport when entering Jantsied. The announcement was met with fierce opposition […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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