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spring

Unger Suspicion

Manitoba Government Declares Winter Over as of March 1

March 3, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Despite a preponderance of evidence to the contrary, winter is officially over, according to the Manitoba government who picked March 1 as the “first day of spring.” “What the heck? I’ve still got […]

The Daily Bonnet

Area Woman Gets a Brand New Pair of ‘Mennonite High Heels’

April 17, 2021 Andrew

BURWALDE, MB After Tara Wiens, 31, of Burwalde took a shortcut to church this week, traipsing through a muddy field, she found she had managed to snag herself a fancy new pair of Mennonite High […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Birds Blissfully Unaware of Global Pandemic

April 18, 2020 Andrew

SPRINGSTEIN, MB More than a dozen robins and two crows congregated on Mrs. Loewen’s yard this week, seemingly blissfully unaware that anything unusual was going on. “I mean I guess Mrs. Loewen’s lawn looks a […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Awarded Top Prize in Annual Southern Manitoba Flower Festival

May 30, 2019 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Competition has been fierce this spring, but Mrs. Epp of Steinbach has come out on top at the annual Southern Manitoba Flower Festival. “I heard there were about 1.3 million competitors this year,” […]

Unger Conviction

Snow Finally Melts Freeing Up Precious Spots in Church Parking Lot

April 23, 2019 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Every winter the parking situation at Altona Gospel Brethren Mennonite Fellowship Church becomes a bit awkward as a huge pile of snow accumulates on the lot and reduces the parking capacity by up […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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