The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

sports

Unger Games

CFL Adds New ‘Mennonite Player Ratio’

June 22, 2019 Andrew

REGINA, SK In an effort to increase the diversity of the league, the Canadian Football League has just announced a new initiative that requires teams to have at least seven Mennonite players on the field […]

Unger Games

Toronto Reaches Trade Deal with St. Louis to Swap Trophies

June 14, 2019 Andrew

TORONTO, ON After stiff negotiations, the City of Toronto has reached a trade deal with the City of St. Louis to trade their NBA Championship Trophy for a Stanley Cup. “Of course, St. Louis doesn’t […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Sells His Toronto Raptors Seat to Buy $400,000 Combine

May 28, 2019 Andrew

TORONTO, ON It was an offer he couldn’t refuse. When Mr. Wiens was offered almost half a million dollars for his court-side seat to Thursday’s game one of the NBA Finals in Toronto, it was […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Jets Players Required to Sleep with Plastic Sheets on their Beds

April 12, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB After yet another horrid performance tonight, the mothers of all the Winnipeg Jets players have required their sons to sleep with plastic sheets on their beds from now on. “I know they’re grown […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Begrudgingly Signs Up for Sportsnet So He Can Watch the Jets Game

April 10, 2019 Andrew

ARBORG, MB Peter Giesbrecht, 67, is really looking forward to the Jets playoff push this year. One thing, however, that he’s not too keen on is subscribing to Rogers Sportsnet just so he can watch […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 24 25 26 … 41 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Left Lane Between Steinbach and Blumenort to be Designated “Slow Minivan Lane”
    December 9, 2018
  • Facebook Bans Mennonite Ladies from Posting Pictures of Flowers
    August 24, 2016
  • Mennonite Church Discards Hymnals Because No One Can Read Music Anymore
    September 15, 2019
  • Mennonite Pastor Super Excited as His Live-Streamed Sermon Gets Three Whole Views
    March 22, 2020
  • New Reports Claims Children Just Faking It, Most Absolutely Love Broccoli and Brussels Sprouts
    June 4, 2022

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved