The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

plautdietsch

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Just Realized that the Last Day of 2023 Will be ‘Eent Twee Dree Eent Twee Dree’

December 30, 2023 Andrew

SPANISH LOOKOUT, BELIZE Mennonites across the Internet were amazed this week when it dawned on them, via various memes, that the last day of 2023 will be eent twee dree eent twee dree. “Jauma, I […]

Unger Games

‘O Canada’ Performed in Low German Before Jets Game

December 18, 2023 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Cheers erupted in Winkler this evening as, for the first time in NHL history, the Canadian national anthem was performed in the Mennonite dialect of Low German. “I’m used to this at Winkler […]

The Daily Bonnet

What’s the 2023 Low German Word of the Year?

November 28, 2023 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB Researchers have scoured Jack Thiessen’s Mennonite Low German Dictionary to choose the most appropriate Plautdietsch word for 2023. The word for this year? None other than Domm’heit. “It’s the closest word in our […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Sets Off Rocket After Calling the Kids in for “Launch”

August 20, 2023 Andrew

PINECRAFT, FL Mrs. Kroeker was vacationing with the family in Florida this week, when she inadvertently launched a rocket ship over in Cape Canaveral. “Oba, I was just calling in the kids for launch yet,” […]

Unger Suspicion

Mickey Mouse Learns Plautdietsch to Accommodate All the Mennonites at Disney World Right Now

March 28, 2023 Andrew

ORLANDO, FL With a bevy of cheap flights sending Mennonites to Florida this week, residents of Disney World have been brushing up on their Plautdietsch, not to mention the theme park’s record-setting order of roll […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 … 14 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Blockbuster Building to be Preserved at Local Museum to Show what Mennonite Life was Like in the 1990s
    February 24, 2024
  • Sound of Knacking Zoat Used as Mennonite Mating Call
    May 2, 2019
  • FDA Approves the Sale of ‘Mennonite Viagra’
    June 14, 2017
  • Local Mom Sentenced to Three Years Watching ‘Peppa Pig’
    February 26, 2018
  • Vaccinated 40-Year-Old Suddenly Has Kick-Ass Cell Phone Coverage
    April 21, 2021

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved