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platz

Unger & Thirst

Introducing the All New 2019 Toyota Platz

December 17, 2018 Andrew

NAGOYA, JAPAN Toyota has just announced the return of their popular Platz model. Originally only available in Japan in the early 2000s, Toyota has responded to the demands of North American Mennonites and unveiled an […]

Unger & Thirst

Canadian Mennonites Lineup to Get Their Hands on Legal Platz

October 17, 2018 Andrew

SOUTH BLUMENORT, MB Ten of thousands of Mennonites across Canada have been lining up outside platz shops today to get their hands on legal platz for the first time in nearly 100 years. “It’s a […]

Unger & Thirst

Justin Trudeau to Legalize Rhubarb Platz

May 31, 2017 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After decades of pressure from platz-users across Canada, the Trudeau government has announced it will introduce legislation to regulate and sell rhubarb platz by the end of the year. “This is a great […]

Unger & Thirst

Man’s Face Left in Permanent Pucker After Rhubarb Platz-Eating Contest

June 5, 2016 Andrew

GRETNA, MB After eating 37 pieces of intensely sour rhubarb platz, local man Cornelius Thiessen has been hospitalized with what doctors are describing as “irreversible damage to his facial structure.” The contest is an annual […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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