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Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Potato Farmer Proclaims Himself “Dyck Tater for Life”

November 26, 2022 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Rudy Dyck from just outside of Swift Current has taken control of a large potato farm this week and refuses to share power with anyone else. “This is not one of them […]

Unger Suspicion

Man with 27% of the Vote Claims He’s Mayor of Winnipeg

October 27, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB For some strange reason, an area man who received just 27% of the vote last night is under the impression that he’s the new mayor of Winnipeg. “I’d like to thank the literally […]

Unger Suspicion

Liberals and NDP Merge to form “Giant Scary Socialist Robot from Outer Space”

April 6, 2022 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON The Canadian government has undergone a transformation this week and is now under the control of a huge ugly socialist robot from outer space. “OMG! Look, it’s Socialist Prime!” tweeted concerned citizen Mr. […]

Unger Suspicion

Justin Trudeau Among 313 Canadians Banned from “Going Anywhere Near Alberta”

March 18, 2022 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Justin Trudeau was at the top of a list of 313 Canadians banned from going “within a hundred kilometers” of Alberta. “We don’t want him wearing a Flames jersey either,” said Calgary man […]

Unger Suspicion

Manitoba Expelled from Confederation After Trudeau Removes First Amendment

February 25, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Manitoba was shocked to discover it was no longer a part of Canada after angry folks on social media suggested Trudeau had removed the “first amendment.” “OMG! Trudeau just tossed the Manitoba Act […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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