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jeans

The Daily Bonnet

Sydney Sweeney Spotted on Kansas Farm in Full Mennonite Attire

July 30, 2025 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Days after launching a controversial new ad campaign for American Eagle, actress Sydney Sweeney has decided to retire to a simpler life on the farm. “At least no one will accuse me of […]

Unger Conviction

Magnus Carlsen Booted Out of Church for Wearing Jeans

December 30, 2024 Andrew

WATERTOWN, NY Norwegian chess superstar Magnus Carlsen had decided to try his hand at a Dutch Blitz tournament up in Watertown, New York this week, when he realized his attire was not suitable for the […]

Unger Suspicion

Mysterious Mennonite Man to Start for Green Bay Packers in Winnipeg Thursday

August 21, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Peter Wiebe’s cousin Kjnels from Swift Current Colony, Mexico will be starting for the Green Bay Packers as they face the Oakland Raiders in an exhibition match in Winnipeg Thursday night. “I can’t […]

Unger Conviction

Millennial Puts on Her Nicest Ripped Jeans for Church this Sunday

January 28, 2018 Andrew

ROSTHERN, SK A 20-something at South Rosthern MB church decided to dress up in her finest attire this Sunday, which consisted of tight ripped blue jeans and an Old Navy sweatshirt, the most formal clothes […]

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  • United States Senate to Perform at Super Bowl Halftime Show
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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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