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heat

Unger Suspicion

Folk Fest Attendee Sells Spot in the Shade for $500 a Square Foot

July 14, 2026 Andrew

BIRDS HILL PARK, MB Area man Wally Dueck, 51, made almost $200,000 selling highly-desirable spots in the shade at the Winnipeg Folk Festival this weekend. “Hey, you look a little sun-stroked there, now, don’t you?” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Women are Shedding their Düaks During Heat Wave

July 12, 2026 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Thousands of Mennonite woman descended AD Penner Park this afternoon to watch the local EMMC-EMC-MC slo-pitch tournament, but soon found they had to make a few adjustment to their attire. “Oba, I’ve experienced […]

The Daily Bonnet

Hottest Ever September in Small Mennonite Town of Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg

October 5, 2024 Andrew

Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg, MB The weather station in Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg recorded the hottest September it the long and illustrious climate history of Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg. “We haven’t seen anything like this since our ancestors first moved to Schanzenhimmelsgruenfeldthalberg almost 150 […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Couple Divorce After Conflict Over Air Conditioner Temperature

July 22, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Eight years of wedded bliss is all over for the Epps of North Kildonan this week, after an apparent marriage-ending fight over the AC temperature. “She wanted it at 23, while I prefer […]

Unger & Thirst

“Spicy” Mennonite Dish Consists Mostly of Dill

February 8, 2024 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB Those who say Mennonites don’t like spicy food obviously don’t know waut de schissjat they’re talking about. A case in point is Mrs. Doris Loeppky, who threw in more than a handful of […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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