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grunthal

The Daily Bonnet

Janitor Left to Clean Up Huge Mess After Mennonite Women “Spill the Tea”

January 31, 2025 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB Darren Klippenstein, janitor at Fifth Mennonite Church in Grunthal, rushed to the scene this evening after he heard the Women’s Quilting Club had spent all evening “spilling the tea.” “We didn’t make much […]

Unger Suspicion

Paul Maurice to Coach Grunthal Red Wings

December 17, 2021 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB Former Winnipeg Jets head coach Paul Maurice has been lured away from his NHL position and has signed on for the upcoming season with the Grunthal Red Wings of the Hanover Tache Hockey […]

Unger Games

Patrik Laine Traded to the Blumenort Menno Knights

October 25, 2020 Andrew

BLUMENORT, MB After months of speculation, the Winnipeg Jets have revealed that 22-year-old superstar Patrik Laine and his seven million dollar a year salary has been traded to the Blumenort Menno Knights of the Hanover-Tache […]

Unger & Thirst

Snake Loose in Grunthal

September 9, 2020 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB The town of Grunthal is in high alert this week after fifteen foot long python was seen chilling on the table during faspa after church. “But, then it just went missing,” said Mr. […]

Unger Suspicion

Justin Trudeau to Vacation in Grunthal, Manitoba From Now On

December 21, 2017 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB After being found guilty of violating numerous federal ethics laws by vacationing on the Aga Khan’s private island, Canadian Prime Minister Justin Trudeau has announced that all upcoming Trudeau family vacations will take […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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