The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

crack

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Vows Never to Wear Suspenders Until the Bombers Win a Grey Cup

November 23, 2019 Andrew

NEUBERGTHAL, MB Oncle Johan Fast has vowed “naver aver” to wear suspenders again until the Winnipeg Blue Bombers bring home the Grey Cup. Many are supportive of his plan, but others are a little troubled […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Discovers Farmer’s Tan in His Plumber’s Crack

August 4, 2019 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Scientists have flocked to the northern Alberta town of La Crete this week after a distinct farmer’s tan was discovered in a local man’s plumber’s crack. “Mr. Klassen is a wonder to […]

The Daily Bonnet

Police Vow to Put a Stop to Mennonite Crack Problem

July 20, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Citizens of the Manitoba capital have been deeply distressed by the ever-increasing crack problem within the city’s Mennonite population this summer. The problem came to a head this week after a huge quantity […]

  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Woman Saves Thousands By Separating the Two-Ply
    April 8, 2018
  • Selfie-Taking City Woman Eaten By Giant Mutant Venus Sunflower Plant
    August 6, 2018
  • Southern Manitoba Transitions from Agricultural-Based Economy to Wedding Venue-Based Economy
    October 4, 2019
  • Reluctant Steinbachers Lured into Winnipeg with Lower Gas Prices
    July 19, 2025
  • Fists Fly After Loewen Family Sits in Penner Family Pew
    February 21, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved