The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Town Bans Pickleball After Concerns About “Dinking”

June 28, 2024 Andrew

REINTHAL, SK Pickleball has caught on across the country. However, concerns about an activity called “dinking” has led one Mennonite community to ban the sport. “We want our seniors to live chaste lives,” said Reinthal […]

Unger Conviction

Louisiana Requires All Schools to Display Pictures of Charlton Heston

June 27, 2024 Andrew

BATON ROUGE, LA Starting this fall all Louisiana schools will be required to display life-size portraits of Charlton Heston. Teachers will be asked to photocopy 8.5 x 11 images from the 1956 classic film The […]

Unger Games

Florida Panthers Give Out Free Slurpees Made from Game-Used Ice

June 25, 2024 Andrew

MIAMI, FL In order to celebrate their first Stanley Cup victory since the team arrived in Miami, the Florida Panthers have scooped up all the ice from Game 7 and turned it into refreshing 7-11 […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonites Consume Record Numbers of Rapple Chaps During Stanley Cup Final

June 24, 2024 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Stores across the Canadian prairies are all out of rapple chaps this evening, as Mennonites stock up for the big game. “We’ve got everything you need for a Stanley Cup party,” said […]

Unger & Thirst

Steinbach Woman Calls Police About Long Line at Krispy Kreme

June 23, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Area woman Mrs. Hiebert, 81, of Steinbach called in a police report this morning after she noticed a long time of vehicles stretching all the way from the new Kripsy Kreme in Winnipeg, […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 136 137 138 … 750 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • 300-Foot Gash Appears in MB Church Baptismal Tank
    June 25, 2026
  • Howard Lutnick Successfully Negotiates Massive $20 Billion Distraction From Epstein Island
    August 22, 2026
  • Steinbach Dentist Concerned About Plaque
    July 6, 2024
  • 5 Mennonite Swear Words that Make No Sense
    February 19, 2023
  • Time Between Ceremony and Reception Extended to Torture Wedding Guests
    September 21, 2019

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved