House of Commons Expansion Still Not Big Enough to Accommodate Politicians’ Egos


With the Centre Block on Parliament Hill set to undergo renovations until 2031, some experts believe the expansion may still not be quite big enough to fit all the egos.

“We’ve crunched the numbers and each Member of Parliament requires at least 1000 square meters of what we call ‘ego space,’” said contractor Frank Dueck. “And in the case of Cabinet Ministers, it’s triple that size.”

According to Dueck, even after the renovations, the building will be able to accommodate fewer than a dozen politicians.

“People always underestimate the size of an overinflated ego,” said Dueck. “It takes up a lot of space.”

The new building will feature a massage parlour where politicians can have their egos stroked as well as a juice bar if they’re feeling down and need an ego boost.

“But it’s not going to be enough, I’m afraid,” said Dueck. “For some reason these folks think that voters actually like them, rather than just plug their noses and chose the lesser of evils.”

MPs have already decided to set aside an extra $30 billion in hopes they might at least have enough room to fit the Prime Minister. 

(photo credit: Ken Lund/CC)

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