TABER, AB
Area man Roger Goertzen, 46, was so aghast at the videos he was watching on TikTok this afternoon that he started yelling through the door at anyone who was in proximity to hear.
“Oba, waut de schissjat is this now yet once such!” yelled Goertzen, reaching for the toilet paper. “What’s that Mark Carney fellow up to now. He’s not seeding the flax that’s for sure!”
Goertzen then flushed the toilet to “clear the air,” before pontificating on the state of the world these days to his children who tried to block things out.
“Yeah, I’m just playing XBox at maximum volume,” said little Harty Goertzen. “I don’t need to hear that man’s throne speeches.”
The throne speech ended abruptly when Roger’s wife Andrea pounded on the door.
“Enough with the speeches, Roger!” yelled Andrea. “There’s only one throne in this house and I’ve really got to go!”
The Goertzens plan to bring in the head of the EMMBC conference to give the throne speech next year.
