CALGARY, AB Like many people these days, local sports fan J.R. Goerzen, 43, is going bonkers without any sports to watch. It’s gotten so bad that Goerzen has been flipping the channels hoping to see […]
MIAMI, FL After tens of thousands of irresponsible “dude bros” disregarded health officials and decided that the pandemic wasn’t going to stop them from partying and spreading the disease to their elderly relatives, local sharks […]
ABBOTSFORD, BC Burned out rocker Abe Dueck, 61, of Abbotsford has decided to wash his hands eight or nine times a day to all 42 minutes of Pink Floyd’s ‘Dark Side of the Moon’. “Breathe, […]
MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA Scientists at the University of Australia have successfully isolated the origin of the ‘Idiot Hoarder’ virus that is ravaging the planet. “We’ve traced it back to a fight between two men in their […]
TORONTO, ON It was the biggest payout in Lotto 6/49 history last night as local man Mr. Thiessen won an entire truck load of toilet paper. “When I saw they were giving out not one, […]
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