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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Etobicoke Eager to Become the New Steinbach

November 28, 2020 Andrew

ETOBICOKE, ON With barbecue joints defying health orders and hundreds of partiers caught not social distancing in a storage locker, the community of Etobicoke, Ontario is eagerly seeking to dethrone Steinbach, Manitoba as the “Covid […]

Unger Suspicion

Libertarian Accidentally Walks Down Public Sidewalk

November 24, 2020 Andrew

TOFIELD, AB Committed libertarian Rand Martens, 31, was walking home from his Dungeons and Dragons game this week when he found himself walking smack dab in the middle of a public sidewalk. “Oh, look at […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Man Shocked to Discover that his “aM a zon ackount has bin sispendead”

November 22, 2020 Andrew

SHERWOOD PARK, AB Local man Ed Klassen, 69, of Sherwood Park, Alberta was absolutely flummoxed to discover that his “aM a zon” account had been disabled and desperately needed to be fixed “by logging in […]

Unger Suspicion

Communist Takeover Complete After Local Man is Politely Asked to Put on a Mask

November 20, 2020 Andrew

SCHLAMMFELD, MB Local communists have declared complete and total victory over the resistant kulaks this week after successfully convincing some guy named Darryl from Schlammfeld to put on a mask. “At last, with this final […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Man’s Biggest Fear is Showing His Fear

November 6, 2020 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Fear of being perceived as being fearful is an at all time high these days, with thousands of insecure men who fear being seen as fearful posting stuff like “stop living in fear” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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