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Unger Suspicion

Unger Suspicion

Ottawa Senators Attendance Way Up this Year

April 12, 2021 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON Literally tens of people, including a few security guards and the water boy, were in attendance at the Ottawa Senators home game last week, which is their highest attendance in ages. “It’s nice […]

Unger Suspicion

Jason Kenney Appointed Sunday School Coordinator at GraceLife Church

April 11, 2021 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Alberta Premier Jason Kenney has decided to set aside some time in his schedule to fill the vacant Sunday School coordinator job at the controversial GraceLife Church. “We’ve got to get to them […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Man Quits Bitcoin and Puts All His Money into Sheets of Plywood

April 6, 2021 Andrew

SASKATOON, SK Having almost doubled his money with Bitcoin over the past year, amateur investor Allan Driedger, 41, of Saskatoon is planning to throw it all in the hottest market around: sheets of plywood. “My […]

Unger Suspicion

‘Tooth & Nail’ Band Books Thirty Night Residency in Baptist Church Basement

April 5, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local punk rocker Sam Dyck, 39, of Kleefeld, Manitoba is really excited that his favourite 90s Christian pop punk band The Undecided have booked a long term residency in the Southdale Baptist basement […]

Unger Suspicion

Aylmer Pastor Awarded Nation’s Highest Honour: A Stained Dirty Star on Canada’s Walk of Fame

March 28, 2021 Andrew

TORONTO, ON A controversial Aylmer-area “pastor” is set to receive Canada’s highest honour: a stained dirty star caked with gum somewhere on a urine-drenched Toronto sidewalk. “After seeing all the good he’s been doing for […]

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