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The Daily Bonnet

Your trusted source for Mennonite satire.

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The Daily Bonnet

Courageous Local Man Arrives on Job Site in Japanese Truck

June 10, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local flooring installer Daniel Dick of Steinbach pulled up to the construction site on Tuesday in a 1983 Datsun 720 crew cab, the sight of which caused considerable laughter among his GMC, Chevy […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Drivers Voted the ‘Best in the Country’

June 5, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB For years, visitors and locals alike have commented with great enthusiasm about the superlative driving skills of Steinbach residents. This reputation was solidified on Monday after the National Automobile Association awarded Steinbach Top Prize […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Politician Pushes for $0.15 Minimum Wage

June 3, 2017 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Local Mennonite MPP Allan Schultz is calling for the Ontario government to set the minimum wage at 15 cents an hour, a rate he claims is a lot more than he “got for […]

The Daily Bonnet

Penner and Penner to Breed Purebred Penner Children

June 3, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Local Winkler couple and not-so-distant cousins Colin Penner and Mary Penner, both in their mid-20s, are expecting a pair of purebred Penner children this fall. The exciting announcement was made at the church faspa last […]

The Daily Bonnet

Horseshoes-Related Injuries Soar in 2017

June 1, 2017 Andrew

MARCHAND, MB After a slow summer last year with less than twenty concussions and two fatalities, the number of horseshoes-related injuries has soared to record heights in Manitoba this spring. If the pace continues, it […]

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