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Unger the Influence

Unger the Influence

Conservatives Vote to Reaffirm Party Leader Mark Carney

March 6, 2026 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON After a leadership review this week, the Conservative Party of Canada has overwhelmingly reaffirmed the leadership of Mark Carney. “He supports free trade, increased military spending, building pipelines, and supporting war with the […]

Unger the Influence

Funk and Penner Endorse Penner for Goertzen’s Job Reports Peters from Reimer

March 1, 2026 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB In what just may be the most Steinbach headline in history, Judy Peters reports from Steinbach City Hall on Reimer Avenue this week that mayor Earl Funk and former city councillor Cari Penner […]

Unger the Influence

US Launches Major Attack on the Epstein Files

February 28, 2026 Andrew

EPSTEIN FILES The US government has launched a surprise full scale attack on the Epstein Files this weekend. “We had to strike and strike hard to prevent the Epstein Files from doing any more damage,” […]

Unger the Influence

James Talarico Article Pulled from the Unger Review

February 19, 2026 Andrew

SEMINOLE, TEXAS The renowned Mennonite satire site The Unger Review had intended to run an article schputting Texas political candidate James Talarico, but had to pull it at the last minute for unknown reasons. “He’s […]

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White House Demands New Bridge Be Rerouted to Epstein Island

February 11, 2026 Andrew

WINDSOR, ON The White House is fuming this week after the new Gordie Howe bridge was set to connect the United States with Canada, instead of the Epstein Island route that they preferred. “We’ve been […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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