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Unger the Influence

Unger Suspicion

Man Who Believes Any Stupid Crap He Reads Online Thinks You’re the One Who’s a Sheep

August 8, 2021 Andrew

DOMMHEIT, AB Local man Mr. Kooltje, 43, who gets all his information from memes and YouTube videos, believes that those who don’t believe stupid crap they find online are “sheep.” “They’re just obeying whatever the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Demand their Constitutional Rights Under the ‘Freedom of Disinformation Act’

July 27, 2021 Andrew

LANCASTER, PA Pastor Troyer of Lancaster County is petitioning the United States government for permission to spread as much BS about the pandemic as he pleases under the ‘Freedom of Disinformation Act’. “What good is […]

The Daily Bonnet

Boats Full of “Persecuted Mennonite Refugees” Fleeing Trivial Nuisances in Canada

July 25, 2021 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Boat loads of Mennonite refugees are once again fleeing their homes for what they believe will be a much better life in the desert someplace where they don’t have to wear masks between […]

Unger Suspicion

Man Who Trashed Entire Neighbourhood When the Canucks Lost Really Upset About a Few Statues Coming Down

July 8, 2021 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Local man Dylan Goossen-Schmidt is really upset about the toppling of a few statues in Winnipeg this week, saying that the only justification for property destruction is when your team wins or loses […]

Unger Suspicion

Maxime Bernier Attracts Just Barely Enough Supporters to Get Himself Arrested

June 11, 2021 Andrew

ST. PIERRE, MB People’s Party leader Maxime Bernier was just beginning his cross-Manitoba ‘Freedom’ tour, when he was arrested in St. Pierre for attracting a massive crowd of six enthusiastic supporters, plus the guy who […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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