MONTREAL, QC A box of delicious greasy poutine has won a whopping 88% of the popular vote this week, although some have doubts about the validity of the results. “I didn’t vote for poutine. My […]
BLUMENBACH, AB Following his whirlwind tour of Russia, “journalist” Tucker Carlson is in northern Alberta this week visiting a small Mennonite village where he appeared to be totally enamoured with the low prices at the […]
OTTAWA, ON A federal judge has just ruled that Prime Minister Justin Trudeau brazenly violated the rights of several pizzas in 2022 by placing pineapple right there next to the ham. “Given the circumstances, I […]
WASHINGTON, DC 130 hymn-singing Mennonites were arrested in Washington, DC this week and charged with being, “like, way too peaceful and stuff.” The arrests came after several dozen Mennonites sat down in the Cannon Hill […]
WASHINGTON, DC After voting to expel corrupt House Representative George Santos this week, Congress has recruited a few folks who were experts in using social rejection as a form of punishment – Mennonites. “We don’t […]
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