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Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Still Chewing the Same Piece of Mom’s “Steak” from 1987

September 11, 2020 Andrew

KLEEFELD, MB For the past thirty years, Steve Kroeker of Kleefeld, now well into his fifties, has been chewing the same piece of overcooked steak his mom served the family in 1987. “I’m not one […]

Unger & Thirst

Snake Loose in Grunthal

September 9, 2020 Andrew

GRUNTHAL, MB The town of Grunthal is in high alert this week after fifteen foot long python was seen chilling on the table during faspa after church. “But, then it just went missing,” said Mr. […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Excommunicated After Washing Grandma’s Cast-Iron Skillet

September 8, 2020 Andrew

PLUM COULEE, MB Local man Albert Janz, 31, has been stripped off his church membership this week after committed the most heinous sin possible – washing a Mennonite Grandma’s cast-iron skillet. “I was just helping […]

Unger & Thirst

“Immodest” Mennonite Woman Leaves Her Zwieback Out for All to See

August 30, 2020 Andrew

OSTERWICK, MB Residents of Osterwick were in shock this afternoon after a fresh and delectable zwieback baked by Mrs. Loewen was left out on the table in the church basement all afternoon. “It’s simply not […]

Unger & Thirst

Chihuahua Faspa Cancelled After Oma Runs Out of Queso Menonita

August 29, 2020 Andrew

MANITOBA COLONY, CHIHUAHUA, MEXICO The Falks of Manitoba Colony had to make a last minute cancellation of fapsa this week after Oma Falk completely forgot to buy more queso Menonita. “As much as we love […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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