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Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Old Dutch Releases New ‘Rapple Chaps’

October 12, 2020 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Mennonites across the Canadian prairies have been consuming significant quantities of Old Dutch chaps for decades. Among their favourite variety are the ridged chips that are good for dipping. Finally the snack has […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Fits Entire Bag of Spitz in His Mouth at Once

October 3, 2020 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Area man Steve Toews, 38, is being hailed as a local hero this week after he stuffed an entire bag of dill pickle Spitz in his mouth at once. “It was the church […]

Unger & Thirst

Little Abe Confuses Smoke Shack for Outhouse

September 28, 2020 Andrew

WARMAN, SK Little Abe Wiebe, 7, of Warman really had to go after a vigorous game of horseshoes with the cousin on Saturday and, so, ran for the nearest outhouse he could find. “No, Abie, […]

Unger & Thirst

Pembina Valley Excited for ‘Vereniki Week’ Competition

September 27, 2020 Andrew

MORDEN, MB While Morden may have the edge in craft beer, when it comes to vereniki and schmaunt fat, the neighbouring community of Winkler really shines. This year, the annual Vereniki Week competition has more […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman’s Glasses are So Foggy She Can’t Even See Who to Judge at the Liquor Store

September 15, 2020 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Fogged-up glasses have one advantage in the Mennonite town of Steinbach – they make it absolutely impossible to recognize anyone in the liquor store. “Not only do the masks obscure your face, but […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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