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Unger & Thirst

Unger & Thirst

Uncle Undoes Pants Button to Make Room for More Sausage

July 2, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB At about 2:00 pm this Sunday, the eating time at the Vogt family picnic at AD Penner Park was thought to be over. The kids had moved on to play on the zip-line, […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Woman Refuses to Pay for Superstore Bags

June 29, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local woman Doris Goosen had her arms full yet again on Thursday evening after she refused to pay the 5 cents for the Superstore plastic bags. “I don’t care if it take me […]

Unger & Thirst

Retiring Teacher Quickly Consumes 30 Years Worth of Apples

June 29, 2017 Andrew

GRETNA, MB With just two days remaining in his illustrious teaching career, retiring teacher Willy Epp of Klaas Reimer Memorial School, decided it was high time he ate all the apples he’d been given over the past thirty years. “I […]

Unger & Thirst

Margarine Mennonite Society Posts Declaration of Principles

June 28, 2017 Andrew

NEW YORK, NY Popular Facebook page The Margarine Mennonite Society has attracted thousands of people with its rather radical views within the Mennonite community, particularly when it comes to margarine consumption. MMS founder Charlie Kraybill says his […]

Unger & Thirst

Guy Fieri Quits Show After Discovering Mennonite Food

June 23, 2017 Andrew

LAS VEGAS, NV Frost-tipped Food Network star Guy Fieri has decided to quit his popular ‘Diners, Drive-ins, and Dives’ show after consuming a scrumptious meal in a Mennonite home this past weekend that, in his words, […]

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