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Articles by Andrew

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Albertans Gladly ‘Render Unto Notley What is Notley’s’

April 11, 2017 Andrew

EDMONTON, AB Three months after Alberta Premier Rachel Notley introduced a new carbon tax in the oil rich province, millions of Albertans have responded with unprecedented positivity that pundits have described as “remarkably Christlike.” “We’re seeing a […]

Unger & Thirst

Check Out These Wacky Mennonite Dishes Inspired by the Daily Bonnet

April 10, 2017 Andrew

Back in February, the Daily Bonnet posted an article entitled ‘Ten Epic Mennonite Dishes We Wish Were Real‘. We never imagined that these dishes could or would actually be created. Well, a few creative Daily Bonnet […]

The Daily Bonnet

Loewen Windows Employee to Marry Barkman Concrete Employee

April 10, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB For the first time in Steinbach history, employees of two of the town’s most storied and successful companies have found love in each other’s arms. “There was a time when you’d have never […]

Unger Conviction

Hip New Church Bulletin Goes All Comic Sans

April 9, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB The Winkler MCEMB Church board voted 6-1 to approve the use of a hip new font on their church bulletins called ‘Comic Sans.’ “We’re expecting big crowds at our services from now on,” […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Town Eagerly Anticipates Spanish Man’s Arrival

April 9, 2017 Andrew

STRASSBURG, MB Members of a tiny church in Strassburg, Manitoba have been laying out palm branches on the street in anticipation of the arrival of Winnipeg resident and estate lawyer Jesus Hernandez. “I can’t believe Jesus […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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