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Articles by Andrew

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Couple Enjoys Romantic Late Night Supper at 4:30 in the Afternoon

September 3, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Mr. and Mrs. Schroeder were really excited that they somehow managed to snag a reservation at the local Mexican restaurant at the prime time of 4:30 in the afternoon. “I can’t believe it […]

The Daily Bonnet

Funk and Reimer Team Up on New Pop Album

September 2, 2019 Andrew

SOMMERFELD, MB ’70s disco sensation Peter Funk and late ’80s gangsta rap star Dick Reimer have joined forces to create a pop music tour de force. The new group called Dick Reimer and the P. […]

Unger Games

Bombers Fan Can’t Figure Out Why the Heck He Goes to these Labour Day Games Anyway

September 1, 2019 Andrew

REGINA, SK Die hard Winnipeg Blue Bombers fan, Colin Kehler of Landmark can’t figure out why on earth he drives all the way out to Regina every year just to watch his team lose yet […]

Unger Suspicion

Families Ripped Apart After Riders Fan Marries Bombers Fan

August 31, 2019 Andrew

SWIFT CURRENT, SK Local Penner and Wiebe gatherings will never be the same after Rider fan Julie Penner, 19, married Bomber fan Timothy Wiebe, 20, in a secret ceremony somewhere in rural Saskatchewan this afternoon. […]

Unger & Thirst

Everyone’s Grandma is the Very Best Cook in the Entire World

August 30, 2019 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON A report out of the University of Kitchener this week confirms what everyone knew all along that their own grandma is the “very best cook in the entire world.” “We tested the cooking […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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