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Articles by Andrew

Unger & Thirst

Willy Warkentin Offers 5 Golden Tickets to Visit Cheese Factory

August 6, 2021 Andrew

NEW BOTHWELL, MB The elusive and mysterious Willy Warkentin will finally come out of hiding after ten long years and plans to offer public tours of his famous cheese factory. “I have hidden five golden […]

Unger Suspicion

Area Man to Play Just One More Game of Tetris

August 5, 2021 Andrew

OMAHA, NE Local man Earl Bergmann, 47, of Omaha has been playing “just one more game of Tetris” since he got that Nintendo Entertainment System during Christmas 1989. “Just one more game, Mom, just one […]

Unger Suspicion

Alberta Man Deported for Failing to Drive an F150

August 4, 2021 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Dan Klassen, 32, of La Crete, Alberta has been given 24 hours to vacate the province and “move to Quebec or someplace” after being spotted driving a Nissan Titan to the job […]

Unger Conviction

Stop Playing God! 7 Ways You’re Playing God Without Even Realizing It!

August 3, 2021 Andrew

Oba, all those people with their modern medicine and science yet! Not only are they completely disregarding the instructions of their trajchtmoaka or alternative medicine practioner, but the worst thing is they’re playing God. God […]

Unger Suspicion

“That’s a personal question”: Area Politician Remains Silent on Science and Logic

August 2, 2021 Andrew

ONNWEEHTENHEIT, MB While many politicians, from all political stripes, have publicly come out in favour of science and logic, a few are refusing to answer the question, saying that “my family’s personal stance on these […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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