The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About The Unger Review
  • Andrew Unger

Month: March 2020

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Church Warns ‘No Casual Meddachschlop During Public Health Crisis’

March 31, 2020 Andrew

SANTA CLARA, MEXICO Public health officials and church leaders are warning Mennonites across North America to refrain from casual meddachschlop with random partners for the duration of the current crisis. “Unless you’ve got a California […]

Unger Suspicion

Blues Albums Seeing a Huge Surge in Sales Right Now

March 30, 2020 Andrew

CHICAGO, IL Things have been so awful the past month or so, that is seems people are turning to music for a little bit of solace. As a result, blues albums have risen to the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Penner Kids Have Been Watching Nothing But ‘Frozen 2’ All Day Every Day for the Past Two Weeks

March 30, 2020 Andrew

HILLSBORO, KS Seemingly unable to watch anything else at all these days, the Penner kids of Hillsboro have had Frozen 2 up on the flatscreen Samsung for the past two weeks straight. “Ugh, they’re not […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Super Excited that He Can Finally Attend Church in His Undies

March 29, 2020 Andrew

OMAHA, NE Mr. Janzen, 43, of Omaha is quickly becoming a regular church attender now that he doesn’t even have to get out of bed and take a shower in order to attend. “Ahh, this […]

The Daily Bonnet

Ten Person Maximum Puts Mennonite Families in Quite the Predicament

March 28, 2020 Andrew

NORTH KILDONAN, MB The Pletts have voted and it seems as if Dad is going to have to quarantine himself in the shed out back so as to adhere to the new ten-person guidelines. “We […]

Posts pagination

1 2 … 7 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Local Man’s Hilarious Wikipedia Edit About Mennonites Goes Unnoticed for Six Years
    August 31, 2018
  • The World’s Easiest Mennonite Quiz
    March 19, 2021
  • Bruce Springsteen to Finally Experience a Winnipeg Winter
    February 15, 2023
  • Jennifer Jones Finds Curlers in Altona
    February 22, 2023
  • Made from What’s Real: New Winnipeg Slogan Pays Tribute to City’s Heritage of Sausage Making
    June 10, 2022

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved