WINKLER, MB Reverend Toews of Vankla is praising his young people for maintaining the Mennonite tradition of not making any physical contact with the opposite sex. Recently, the phenomenon of the ‘hover hand’ was brought […]
RIYADH, SAUDI ARABIA After an online Twitter war with the Canadian Prime Minister about human rights, the Kingdom of Saudi Arabia has made the decision to “immediately remove any and all statues of Justin Trudeau […]
KITCHENER, ON A new study from the University of Waterloo-Kitchener-Cambridge has revealed that, contrary to popular opinion, “not all Mennonites are Dicks.” “Far from it,” said study organizer Dr. Lehman. “In fact, if you include […]
ROSETOWN, MB Late last night Mennonite man, Samuel Fehr, 35, was spotted at a Rosetown picnic shelter working his way through a piece of Oma’s chokecherry pie. Authorities intevened when Fehr was still there after […]
LAKE WINNIPEG, MB A 43-year-old man from over by Reinland somewheres was found beached on the shores of Lake Winnipeg this weekend. Thankfully locals were able to keep him hydrated with Rogers Golden Syrup while […]
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