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Month: February 2017

Unger & Thirst

Ten Epic Mennonite Dishes We Wish Were Real

February 16, 2017 Andrew

For the most part, Mennonite cuisine, like the people who cook it, remains rather slow to change. While some variations on classic recipes have been attempted (such as MJ’s Mennonite poutine), for the most part […]

Unger Suspicion

Mennonite Woman Consults ‘Fifty Shades of Grey’ for Wardrobe Advice

February 15, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Local senior, Helen Stoesz, was shocked by the misleading content of the popular book Fifty Shades of Grey, which she purchased used at the local MCC store hoping for advice on how to update her […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Woman to Become ‘Unequally Yoked’ With Lutheran Man

February 15, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB The Penner and Richter families are pleased to announce the unequal yoking of their children Amanda and Paul this spring. The engagement was announced at a recent Penner family gathering to the sheer […]

The Daily Bonnet

With the Kids at Grandma’s Tonight, Mennonite Couple Finally Gets a Chance to Play Scrabble

February 14, 2017 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB Mennonite couples across southern Manitoba are planning to celebrate Valentine’s Day the only way they know how: by playing Scrabble. “It’ll be nice to have some time to ourselves for once. We’ve sent […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Lady to Spend the Evening Reading Amish Romance Books

February 14, 2017 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Local spinster Annie Goertzen, 51, will spend a romantic evening alone tonight snuggling up on her sofa with a glass of dealcoholized wine, half a Toblerlone bar, and an Amish romance book. “These […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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