WASHINGTON, DC
It’s the boldest change to airport security requirements in more than twenty years–starting this weekend, Mennonites will no longer be required to remove their socks and sandals when passing through airport security.
“That combo was a real fashion faux pas twenty years ago, but now not so much,” said TSA spokesperson Dolores Schmidt. “I guess we figured it’s not the threat to fashion that it once was.”
TSA specifically cited the strange Gen Z penchant for sporting socks and sandals at the same time.
“I don’t get it, but, hey, to each her own I guess,” said Schmidt. “Sadly, we’ve also had to lift the ban on wearing Crocs.”
Mennonites were excited about the news, which has allowed more conservative folks to travel for the first time in decades.
“For years I never went close to an airport,” said Taunte Lina of Moundridge, Kansas. “I was just never comfortable with exposing my Toews.”
The increase in Mennonite air travel will be a boon to top tourist destinations like the MCC store in Mountain Lake, Minnesota and highly anticipated events like the annual VBS at Bethesda Mennonite in Henderson, Nebraska.
