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Unger the Influence

TSA Will No Longer Require Mennonites to Remove Socks and Sandals

July 10, 2025 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC It’s the boldest change to airport security requirements in more than twenty years–starting this weekend, Mennonites will no longer be required to remove their socks and sandals when passing through airport security. “That […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Travellers Required to Dispose of Roll Kuchen Before Boarding

July 27, 2022 Andrew

LANGHAM, SK The security line at the Langham International Airport was around the block this weekend after the federal government passed a new law requiring all Mennonites to dispose of their roll kuchen and syrup […]

Unger & Thirst

Toronto Woman Caught Smuggling Three Suitcases Full of Farmer Sausage

September 17, 2019 Andrew

TORONTO, ON Mrs. Wiebe, 47, of Toronto was caught at the Pearson Airport this week with three suitcases packed full of delicious Mennonite farmer sausage that she obtained on a recent trip to southern Manitoba. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Loops Parking Lot for an Hour to Avoid Paying for Parking

January 12, 2019 Andrew

CALGARY, AB Local man Jeremy Goerzen, 39, was picking up his friends at the airport who were visiting from Manitoba. Unfortunately the flight was delayed and so, instead, of paying ten dollars to park, Jeremy […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Strip Searched at Airport; Security Shocked at What they Found!

July 10, 2018 Andrew

VANCOUVER, BC Mr. Klassen of Yarrow, BC was selected for random screening at the Vancouver Airport this past week. Mr. Klassen had been heading to visit frintschoft in Kansas, when he was pulled aside for […]

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    July 23, 2024
  • Churchill Polar Bears to Be Relocated to Southern Manitoba
    January 31, 2017

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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