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winter

The Daily Bonnet

Snowfall Finally Convinces Manitobans They Don’t Actually Live in BC

December 12, 2023 Andrew

CARMAN, MB Derek Loeppky of Carman, who had been living it up like a British Columbian for the past several months, was absolutely devastated this weekend to find out he actually lived in Manitoba. “There […]

The Daily Bonnet

Steinbach Man Fined for Obstructed View; Everyone Thinks It’s Satire

November 22, 2023 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB When Steinbach Online reported earlier today about a local man who was stopped by the RCMP this week for driving with his entire windshield covered in snow, everyone thought they were just reading […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Refuses to Do Her Christmas Shopping Until There’s Snow on the Ground

November 16, 2023 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Mrs. Ruth Peters of Winkler is amassing a long list of presents to buy, all because the lack of snow on the ground this November has not put her in the right mood […]

Unger Suspicion

Manitobans Shocked to Experience an Actual Fall this Year

October 22, 2023 Andrew

BRANDON, MB The province of Manitoba has been in a state of complete shock for the past month as, for some strange reason, winter didn’t follow immediately after summer this year. “Orange leaves, temperate weather? […]

Unger & Thirst

Delicious Beet Borscht Used to Melt Ice All Over Manitoba

April 11, 2023 Andrew

VITA, MB As temperatures rise and roads are looking treacherous, it appears that soup has come to the rescue, as dozens of ice cream pails of Baba’s delicious beet borscht are being ladled onto provincial […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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