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The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Man Drives All the Way to Winnipeg with His Turn Signal On

September 29, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Local man Peter Sawatzky, 72, is being hailed as a hero in Winkler this week after successfully driving all the way to the Costco on McGillvray with his right turn signal on. “I […]

Unger Suspicion

Portage and Main to be Accessed Exclusively by Blizzards and Ice Storms

September 26, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The votes are in and Winnipeg has decided overwhelmingly to restrict access to its most famous intersection to anything other than fierce winds, massive blizzards, devastating ice storms and maybe a tornado or […]

Unger Suspicion

Local Quilting Ladies Accidentally Attend Metallica Concert

September 14, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB The ladies from the Winkler EMMB Quilting Group were heading into the city on one of their monthly outings. They had intended to attend a panel discussion at the Millennium Library, when a […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg’s Garbage Hill to Be Returned to its Former Glory

September 11, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Winnipeg’s most famous former landfill, Garage Hill, will be returned to its former glory later this month after the landmark received a renewed surge in interest as of late. “It’s time we make […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Folklorama Pavilion the Only One Without Booze or Dancing

August 10, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Folklorama, Winnipeg’s annual celebration of the city’s cultural diversity, is known for bringing the sights, tastes, and sounds of the world to the good people of Manitoba. The infamous Mennonite Pavilion, however, has […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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