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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Caught Watching Figure Skating

February 15, 2022 Andrew

KITCHENER, ON Mr. Noah Eby of Kitchener had to quickly change the channel and pretend to be watching politicians yell at each other, after his wife Mary walked in on him during the pair skating […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Satirist Shunned After Appearing on Television

January 4, 2022 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB An unphotoshopped photo of Mennonite satirist and longtime Steinbach resident Andrew Unger has surfaced on Reddit this week, apparently showing the writer on a television show of some sort. “Oba, we’ve kicked people […]

The Daily Bonnet

‘The Voice’ to Feature Nothing but Mennonite Family Trios from Now On

December 15, 2021 Andrew

PETTISVILLE, OH After the success of Girl Named Tom this year, NBC’s ‘The Voice’ has committed to exclusively bringing in Mennonite singing groups from now on. “The Liechtys showed us that Mennonites could sing a […]

Unger Suspicion

Netflix Finally Allows Young People to See that ‘Seinfeld’ is Way Better than ‘Friends’

October 13, 2021 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN For the millions of young people too young to really remember the 90s, the chance to finally see Seinfeld has blown more than a few minds. “Oh my gosh. I can’t believe I […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Child Forced to Miss ‘Wonderful World of Disney’ to Attend Evening Service

June 18, 2021 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Collin Berg, 7, of Mitchell, Manitoba had to miss The Wonderful World of Disney yet again this weekend in order to attend the EMBC faspa and evening service. “Now I’ll never know what happens […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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