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shunning

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Gather in Winnipeg to Decide which Writer to Excommunicate Next

June 12, 2025 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB While scholars and writers gather at Canadian Mennonite University this weekend for the 2025 Mennonite/s Writing Conference, another gathering is taking place across the city with an entirely different purpose. “Mennonite writers are […]

Unger the Influence

Congress Hire Mennonites to Shun George Santos

December 2, 2023 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC After voting to expel corrupt House Representative George Santos this week, Congress has recruited a few folks who were experts in using social rejection as a form of punishment – Mennonites. “We don’t […]

Unger & Thirst

Mennonite Man Banished From Town After Choosing the Sweet Pickles

August 1, 2022 Andrew

TOFIELD, AB Area man Todd Sawatzky has lost the respect of everyone in all of Tofield this week after he piled his plate with bread and butter pickles instead of the good ones. “Waut de […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Satirist Shunned After Appearing on Television

January 4, 2022 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB An unphotoshopped photo of Mennonite satirist and longtime Steinbach resident Andrew Unger has surfaced on Reddit this week, apparently showing the writer on a television show of some sort. “Oba, we’ve kicked people […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Celebrates 150 Years of Passive Aggressive Behaviour

July 3, 2021 Andrew

FRADLIJCHTHAL, SK A local Mennonite church is coming together this weekend to eat dill pickles and commemorate their long-standing commitment to passive aggressive behaviour. “As one of the historic peace churches, we know that this […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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