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music

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Storms Out of Jazz Club, Claiming “Far Too Much Sax”

November 16, 2017 Andrew

YARROW, BC Local man Peter Harder, 67, was so disgusted with a jazz performance in Vancouver this weekend that he stood up right in the middle of ‘St. Thomas’ and stormed out in a huff. […]

Quizzes

Menno Simons Quote or Metal Lyrics?

November 2, 2017 Andrew

Early Dutch Anabaptist leader Menno Simons wrote more than 1000 pages of theological writing. As Mennonites, we take our name from Menno Simons, but how many of us have actually read his writings? Perhaps some […]

Unger Suspicion

Rare Video Footage of an 80s Pop Legend Singing Hymn 606

October 10, 2017 Andrew

The Daily Bonnet has recently uncovered some very rare footage of the King of Pop singing “Praise God from Whom All Blessings Flow.” The video was discovered in Mr. Horst’s attic, and was believed to […]

Unger Suspicion

Burton Cummings to Donate His Moustache to Charity

October 1, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Legendary Canadian rocker Burton Cummings is set to become a little bit lighter this weekend after agreeing to shave his signature moustache and auction it off for charity. “We’re thinking his moustache could […]

Unger Suspicion

Sparse Crowd at Nickelback Concert, Mostly Just Mennonites

September 21, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB It seems that a few dozen Mennonites from rural Manitoba are the only people in the country who don’t realize how bad a band Nickelback really is. With thousands of tickets left for […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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