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movies

Unger Suspicion

‘May the 3rd Be With You’: Confused Mennonite Man Sends Premature Greeting

May 4, 2024 Andrew

ALTONA, MB Area man Larry Hiebert, 51, turned more than a few heads this Friday, after he spent the whole day greeting folks with a hearty “May the 3rd be with you.” “He started on […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Excited to Take Flight in Neighbour’s Flying Car

March 28, 2024 Andrew

ELKHART, IN The whole neighbourhood was abuzz this week as Mr. Funk of Elkhart unveiled his new license plate, which clearly indicated he had converted his sedan into a flying car. Naturally, next door neighbour […]

The Daily Bonnet

Blockbuster Building to be Preserved at Local Museum to Show what Mennonite Life was Like in the 1990s

February 24, 2024 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB An old Blockbuster Video building was carefully hoisted onto the back of a semi trailer this week before winding up at a Mennonite open air museum in Steinbach. “When our grandchildren ask about […]

Unger Games

Winnipeg Kids Excited for New ‘Princess Elsa Stadium’

January 25, 2024 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Children all over the Winnipeg metro area (so, like, umm, Winnipeg plus Niverville or something) were super excited about the announcement of the new Princess Elsa Stadium. “They’re losing sleep over it,” said […]

Unger Suspicion

Ryan Gosling Nabs ‘Best Director’ Nomination for Playing Ken in ‘Barbie’

January 24, 2024 Andrew

HOLLYWOOD, CA The Oscar nominations are out and leading the way this year was the runaway smash hit ‘Barbie’ which, apparently, was written, produced, and directed by Ryan Gosling. “As far as we can tell, […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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