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morden

Unger Conviction

Elders Warn that Morden, Manitoba is Full of ‘Aufjefollna’ Mennonites

November 17, 2019 Andrew

MORDEN, MB Cousin Pieta of Reinland was spotted cruising down the highway to Morden this past week and was immediately branded as ‘aufaulle‘ by the village purity committee. “Diestchlaund, that cousin Pieta, heading to Morden […]

The Daily Bonnet

Morden and Winkler Tired of Having to Share a Hospital

September 16, 2019 Andrew

HALFWAY BETWEEN MORDEN AND WINKLER, MB Mr. Penner of Winkler was mighty upset this week after he found out he had to share a hospital room with that Mr. Sawatzky from Morden. “Ugh, a Mordener […]

The Daily Bonnet

‘Winkler Humility’ March Offers Stark Contrast to ‘Morden Pride’

June 24, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Days after Morden’s first ever Pride march, a confused, yet earnest, Mennonite man from Winkler decided to hold a march of his own. “Jauma, those Mordeners, always so proud and smiling and having […]

Quizzes

The Ultimate Pembina Valley Mennonite Quiz!

March 16, 2019 Andrew

Well, so, oba, how much do you know abouts da Mannanates of da former West Reserve once? We’ll see now, won’t we yet? Okay, dan! [os-widget path=”/dailybonnet/the-ultimate-pembina-valley-quiz”]

The Daily Bonnet

Winkler Politician Demands $5 Billion Wall Around Morden

January 9, 2019 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Church board member and man-about-town Mr. Toews of Winkler is threatening to shut down the local government unless the local senate approves a $5.7 billon wall around the neighbouring town of Morden. “You […]

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