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money

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Go Crazy for New Cryptocurrency the ‘Plettcoin’

December 27, 2017 Andrew

LANDMARK, MB A new Mennonite cryptocurrency known as the plettcoin soared to record highs this past week before quickly plummeting to embarrassing lows. The plettcoin, once valued at close to $20,000, is now so useless […]

The Daily Bonnet

Grandpa Wiebe Knipses Twelve Twenties in a Row

December 22, 2017 Andrew

VANKLA, MB Grandpa Wiebe of Vankla impressed all the Wiebes at the Wiebe gathering last night after knipsing twenty after twenty, and at the rate of a toonie per knispe, earned himself quite the pile […]

Unger Suspicion

What Happens When a Mennonite Replies to an Email Scammer? (This is for Real)

December 6, 2017 Andrew

A while ago I watched a TED Talk by James Veitch, which documents what happened when he replied to a spam email offering him the opportunity for riches beyond compare if only he would provide some […]

The Daily Bonnet

Winnipeg Hipsters Pay Big Bucks to Milk Cows

December 1, 2017 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Always seeking “authentic old school” experiences, the hipster population of Winnipeg is now venturing outside the Perimeter to milk cows in rural Manitoba. Mennonite farmers in the region have been eager to capitalize […]

Unger Suspicion

$8 Billion Marijuana Theme Park to Be Built on Parliament Hill

November 30, 2017 Andrew

OTTAWA, ON As part of the Canada 150 celebrations, the Trudeau Government has just announced the construction of a multi-billion dollar Cannabis Land theme park on Parliament Hill. After a rigorous consultation process, which included […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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