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Unger Games

Curling Match Cancelled After Mennonite Men Refuse to Cast the First Stone

September 23, 2023 Andrew

ALTONA, MB The curling season in Altona, Manitoba has been postponed this weekend after Mr. Plett and Mr. Kroeker both refused to cast the first stone. “I blame Pastor Ron,” said local curling fan Dave […]

Unger & Thirst

Liquor Store Strike Leaves Mennonites Without Any Place to Judge Each Other

July 29, 2023 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB As workers at Manitoba liquor stores have been on strike this week, thousands of Mennonites have been left without any place to cast sidelong glances and whisper disparaging remarks about their friends and […]

The Daily Bonnet

Facebook Rolls Out New ‘Disapproving Mennonite Grandma’ Reaction Button

May 3, 2020 Andrew

WINKLER, MB After finding the new ‘hug’ reaction to be a little too intimate for their liking, Mennonites demanded a reaction button that was more suited to their general inclinations. In response to their demands, […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Points Out Speck of Sawdust in Brother’s Eye

February 4, 2020 Andrew

KIDRON, OH Mr. Hofstetter just couldn’t believe the size of the speck in Mr. Horst’s eye this week and made sure to point it out to him in the church lobby on Sunday. “Would you […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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