The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

jesus

Unger Conviction

Local Heart Surgeon Locates Jesus

December 1, 2018 Andrew

WINKLER, MB A local surgeon has finally discovered the exact location of Jesus in the human heart. Just this past week, Dr. Penner opened up Mr. Klassen’s ticker and found Jesus. “Scientists have been trying […]

The Daily Bonnet

Six Hospitalized After Jesus Takes the Wheel

August 30, 2018 Andrew

GOSHEN, IN Four Yoders and two Millers were rushed to the hospital in Goshen this week after Mr. Yoder decided to relinquish his driving duties and let Jesus take over. “I was heading down the […]

Quizzes

Quiz: Is it a sin or is it NOT a sin?

June 22, 2018 Andrew

Let’s face it, a lot of the stuff the elders claimed was sinful was just made up at a board meeting back in the 1960s sometime. Still, if you’ve been raised in a strict Mennonite […]

Unger Suspicion

Government Needs Your Help in Tracking Down Family of Asylum Seekers Who Crossed the Border Late Last Night

June 20, 2018 Andrew

NATIONAL BORDER REGION The federal government is seeking the public’s help in tracking down a family of undocumented migrants who are believed to have crossed the border into the country in the middle of the […]

Unger & Thirst

Fourth Wiseman Rejected for Bringing Halva

December 23, 2017 Andrew

BETHLEHEM, JUDEA The fourth wiseman, Peter Wiebe, who followed the star all the way from the East Reserve, was apparently turned away at the entrance to Bethlehem this week for bringing the dry chalky substance […]

Posts pagination

« 1 2 3 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Mennonite Woman “Wins the Lottery” After Neighbour’s Clothes Blow into Her Yard
    July 8, 2025
  • Man Consoles Himself With Gospel Music as Team Loses
    November 27, 2016
  • Mennonite Woman Amasses World’s Largest Collection of Plastic Bags
    July 19, 2022
  • Mennonite Woman Sings So Beautifully Out Her Nose
    December 27, 2024
  • Pastor Declares Self-Service Corn Stand an ‘Evil Temptress’
    August 31, 2016

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved