The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

heavy metal

Unger Suspicion

Deceased Mennonite Man Shocked to Encounter Ozzy Osbourne

July 24, 2025 Andrew

HEAVEN Pastor David Thiessen, who passed away more than 30 years ago, was shocked to discover that heavy metal icon Ozzy Osbourne had joined him in Heaven this week. “I’m more than a little surprised, […]

Unger Suspicion

Metalheads Accidentally Attend Beth Moore Event

December 3, 2022 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB It was yet another mix-up in the maze of hallways and passageways leading to Winnipeg downtown arena this week, which had metalheads Peter and Darryl Plett show up at a Beth Moore conference […]

Unger Suspicion

Putin and Biden to Form New Metal Band ‘Minor Incursion’

January 21, 2022 Andrew

MOSCOW, RUSSIA After high level talks this weekend, Russian President Vladimir Putin has decided to team up with his American counterpart Joe Biden in a “new heavy metal side project called Minor Incursion.” “We’ve only […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church to Host First Annual ‘Quiet in the Land’ Death Metal Festival

January 15, 2020 Andrew

ELKHART, IN In an effort to attract young people to church, the South Elkhart Mennonite Church is planning a death metal concert to be held in the church parking lot this summer. “In keeping with […]

Unger Conviction

‘Iron Maiden’ Performs to Sold Out Crowd at Local Mennonite Church

November 17, 2018 Andrew

ELIDA, OH There was some confusion with the local metal community after tickets they had purchased to see UK heavy metal icons ‘Iron Maiden’ turned out to be a performance by a single Mennonite woman […]

Posts pagination

1 2 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Area Church Seemingly Doesn’t Realize that God is Not Confined to a Parking Lot
    November 29, 2020
  • Nintendo Releases New Game for Mennonite Children
    December 19, 2018
  • Mennonite Church Suspends Man 41 Weeks for Using Playing Cards
    October 28, 2023
  • Mennonite Man Calls Mother-in-Law “Hey You” to Avoid Calling Her “Mom”
    February 26, 2024
  • New Biopic Reveals Freddie Mercury’s ‘Secret Wild Mennonite Life’
    February 16, 2019

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2025 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved