ABBOTSFORD, BC Burned out rocker Abe Dueck, 61, of Abbotsford has decided to wash his hands eight or nine times a day to all 42 minutes of Pink Floyd’s ‘Dark Side of the Moon’. “Breathe, […]
BIRD-IN-HAND, PA Mrs. Beiler, 63, who was shunned three months ago after wearing a knee-length skirt to a church potluck, is among the safest people on the planet these days. “The shunning was bad at […]
DITSIED, MB Mr. Harder of Ditsied is in self-imposed quarantine for the next two weeks after an “international” trip he took to the other side of the river. “I went all the way to Jantsied,” […]
MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA Scientists at the University of Australia have successfully isolated the origin of the ‘Idiot Hoarder’ virus that is ravaging the planet. “We’ve traced it back to a fight between two men in their […]
FOUR MOUNTAINS, BC A local Bible school is taking drastic measures to prevent the spread of the pandemic by expanding the six-inch buffer zone between opposite-gender students to a full six feet. “We’ve always taken […]
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