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donald trump

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Pastor Launches New Line of $99 NFT Trading Cards

December 26, 2022 Andrew

CHILLIWACK, BC When Pastor Randy hinted at a ‘major announcement’ this upcoming Sunday, everyone thought it was going to be either a resignation or pregnancy, but instead Pastor Randy unveiled an amazing new series of […]

Unger Suspicion

10 Things Definitely NOT Found in Donald Trump’s Safe

August 15, 2022 Andrew

While there has been much speculation about the contents of Donald Trump’s Mar-A-Lago safe, we here at The Daily Bonnet feel it’s best not to speculate. There’s no doubt the safe is filled with high […]

Unger Suspicion

FBI Discovers Massive Stash of Yerba Tea at Trump Estate

August 9, 2022 Andrew

MAR-A-LAGO, FL According to sources, former President Donald Trump has been growing over 1000 acres worth of yerba mate at his Florida estate. The illicit stash of Paraguayan tea leaves is believed to have been […]

Unger Suspicion

Donald Trump Flip Flops on Mennonites, Now Says He “Loves Them”

June 5, 2022 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC In yet another flip-flop from the position he held during the election campaign, where he threatened to build a wall to prevent Mennonites from coming into the country, Donald Trump now claims he […]

Unger Suspicion

Trump to Return to Office June 31

June 29, 2021 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC According to sources, former President Donald Trump has been biding his time just waiting for his chance to return to the White House on the 31st of June. “Tremendous news, everybody, just tremendous,” […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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