The Unger Review
  • Sections
    • The Daily Bonnet
    • Headline Contest
    • Unger Conviction
    • Unger Games
    • Unger the Influence
    • Unger Suspicion
    • Unger & Thirst
  • Mennotoba
  • The Daily Bonnet
  • The Best of the Bonnet
  • About
  • Merch
  • Andrew Unger

crime

Unger & Thirst

New Bothwell Resident Arrested for Putting Processed Cheese on His Burger

April 30, 2019 Andrew

NEW BOTHWELL, MB Local man Mr. P_________________, has been arrested and arraigned on charges of failing to use Bothwell cheese at a BBQ this week. “Not only was he not using the best cheese in […]

Unger Suspicion

Winnipeg Man Gets 20 Years in Prison for Stealing A&W Mug

March 29, 2019 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB A 40-year-old man from Winnipeg was sentenced to twenty years in a maximum security prison this week for stealing an A&W root beer mug back in 1998. “For years it was a cold […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Man Attempts to Outdo Florida Man

March 22, 2019 Andrew

GOESSEL, KS Distraught at all the publicity this ‘Florida Man’ has been getting as of late, Colin Wiens, 22, of Goessel, Kansas decided he was going to get his name on the front page of […]

Unger Suspicion

New Huawei Phones Capable of Taking ‘Totally Amazing Photos’ of their Own Executive’s Arrest and Extradition!

December 13, 2018 Andrew

VANCOUVER, BC Chinese electronics giant Huawei is really proud of the amazing 48 MP capabilities of their Mate 20 Pro, a phone that’s being marketed as “the only smartphone to capture those stunning images of […]

The Daily Bonnet

Thrift Store Prices Still Not Cheap Enough for Mennonite Thieves

November 6, 2018 Andrew

WINNIPEG, MB Soaring prices at local thrift stores have forced some unscrupulous Mennonites into shoplifting in order to obtain the rubber boots and crocheted doilies needed for bare survival. “When I saw the prices, I had no other choice,” […]

Posts pagination

« 1 … 7 8 9 … 14 »
  • Facebook
  • Twitter
  • Instagram

More from the unger review

  • Monsieur Hebert is Sick and Tired of Being Called “Mr. Hiebert”
    January 11, 2021
  • Djokovic Retires from Tennis to Take on Trucking Job in Canada
    January 23, 2022
  • Manitoba Sends Emergency Supply of Farmer Sausage to Alberta
    September 20, 2021
  • ‘Pacifism is Totally Impractical’ Says Large Multinational Weapons Manufacturer
    December 1, 2016
  • The Daily Bonnet Asks: Can You Be Both Christian and Rich?
    June 11, 2022

SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

HOME OF

Copyright © 2026 The Unger Review - All Rights Reserved