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The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite College Students Crash ChatGPT by Requesting Too Many Hauerwas Essays All at Once

February 7, 2023 Andrew

HIEBERTFELD, SK Students at Mennonite colleges and universities nearly crashed the system this week by asking ChatGPT to create 5-page essays on the work of Stanley Hauerwas. “We had thousands of requests within minutes. It […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonites Urge Joe Biden to Forgive Their Sunday School Expenses

August 25, 2022 Andrew

WASHINGTON, DC Upwards of three thousand angry Mennonites descended on Washington this week to demand that Joe Biden pay for the complete cost of all the “Elmer’s glue, popsicle sticks, and flannel pictures of the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Family Discovered Camping in Briercrest Parking Lot

August 23, 2022 Andrew

CARONPORT, SK The custodial crew at Briercrest Bible College and Seminary were in quite the state of shock this morning as they found that a whole nest of Mennonite families had pulled over for the […]

The Daily Bonnet

Which Mennonite Colleges and Universities Made the ‘Final Four’?

April 7, 2022 Andrew

BLUFFTON, OH Every spring, Mennonite post-secondary institutions gather in Bluffton, Ohio to drink decaf and argue about seemingly trivial differences in theology. The event begins with dozens of school, but eventually the best debaters make […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Woman Refunded Tuition After Graduating Bible School Single

May 7, 2021 Andrew

WINKLER, MB Samantha Peters, 22, was the lone unmarried graduate at Vankla Bible Institute this spring and, thus, was refunded her full tuition including the cost of textbooks. “Ugh, well, I guess I just wasted […]

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