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Unger Conviction

Child With Eyes Open During Prayer Spots Child With Eyes Open During Prayer

November 9, 2021 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Lisa Plett, 7, of Mitchell had her eyes open during the pre-faspa prayer this Sunday just long enough to spot her cousins Timmy, Susie, and Anne, who also had their eyes open. “Mom! […]

Unger Conviction

Christian Service Brigade Defends Church Basement from Invading Pioneer Girls

October 21, 2021 Andrew

STEINBACH, MB More than two dozen Tadpoles and Treeclimbers ran for cover behind upturned Chesterfields in the Youth Room last night as the Pioneer Girls stormed into the basement to sew badges onto their sashes. […]

The Daily Bonnet

Mennonite Couple Discovers Where Babies Come from Just a Little Too Late

October 1, 2021 Andrew

LA CRETE, AB Newlyweds Anne and Peter Krahn of the La Crete area quickly discovered where babies come from after a weekend at the Days Inn and a half bottle of Crown Royal. “Oba, so […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Child Forced to Miss ‘Wonderful World of Disney’ to Attend Evening Service

June 18, 2021 Andrew

MITCHELL, MB Collin Berg, 7, of Mitchell, Manitoba had to miss The Wonderful World of Disney yet again this weekend in order to attend the EMBC faspa and evening service. “Now I’ll never know what happens […]

Unger & Thirst

How old were you when you first began to like borscht?

April 2, 2021 Andrew

As a child of the 1980s, I grew up primarily on Chicken McNuggets with sweet and sour sauce (or barbecue if I’d been good that week), so it was only later in life that I […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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