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baptism

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Infant Asks to Be Baptized Upon Confession of Her Faith

December 17, 2016 Andrew

WICHITA, KS This past Sunday, an eight-month old Mennonite baby in Wichita, Kansas became the youngest child ever to be baptized upon confession of her faith. “At North Wichita MBCM church we take seriously the Anabaptist […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Church Accidentally Performs First Ever Infant Baptism

September 20, 2016 Andrew

NEWTON, KS The first infant baptism in the history of the Mennonite church was performed last Sunday in Newton, Kansas, as a local pastor used a little too much water in his pouring of 24-year-old expectant […]

Unger & Thirst

Fraser Valley Man Dunks Donut, Sparks Massive Theological Debate

September 11, 2016 Andrew

CLEARBROOK, BC Little did Elmer Friesen know when he dunked his chocolate glazed donut in his coffee at the local Tim Hortons, that this small act would spark a theological feud with neighbouring coffee drinkers. […]

Unger Conviction

Mennonite Man Baptized a Third Time Just to Make Sure

July 15, 2016 Andrew

ALTONA, MB The term anabaptist, literally meaning “rebaptizer” is generally regarded as a misnomer in the 21st century since most members of the group are only ever baptized once as adults. However, a particularly pious […]

Unger Conviction

Pastor Drops Five Infants During Last Sunday’s Child Dedication Service

June 3, 2016 Andrew

MOUNTAIN LAKE, MN A reverend of a local Mennonite church has been sent on sabbatical after accidentally dropping nearly half a dozen infants in a single child dedication service. “That Bentley Hiebert is a slippery […]

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SATIRICAL NEWS BY ANDREW UNGER

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